Apparently, these are the perennial questions about sex especially for women: “if we have sex, will he call,” and for men, “when will she be ready.” When a little suspicious of such glib formulations, just nod to the spirit of the clichés. Sex is messy and complex, and never more so than when it is with a new person. It is important, very important, to have sex at just the right time in a relationship.

Do it for you
Have sex because you want to, not because you feel pressured or think the other person will disappear if you don't. A person like that is not looking for a serious relationship in the first place and you are just another receptacle for him/her. Do it when it feels right and do it for you. Better late and more
Whether you are a man or a woman, it is always better to get physical later, rather than sooner in a relationship. Why? Because you will get to know the other person better and be in a better position to decide if you really do want to sleep with him or her. Margaret Paul, Do I Have To Give Up Me to Be Loved By You? says, “[People try] to get the intimate connection through sex, but great sex is an outgrowth of intimacy, not a cause of it. ... Physical attraction is never enough to see people through the inevitable conflicts that come up in primary relationships.” Focus on the relationship
As important and fun as sex is, if it is a relationship you want, then pay attention to nurturing that. Get to know the other person better and let them know things about you. If you ask yourself, “Do I trust this person?” you should be able to say, “Yes” with no doubts. This is the way to feel more comfortable around him or her, and that is a prerequisite for good sex. The physical attraction will only become stronger and more deeply grounded. Is what you have enough?
Look at how much physical closeness you already have. Do you hold hands? Do you have trouble keeping your hands off each other? Is there a spark between you? When you kiss, do you want more? What does the person's kissing style suggest to you about their bedroom style? What do you have besides chemistry? In the answers to these questions, you will find if it is the right time, or even if it is actually what you want. Get the time right, literally
Whether it is spontaneous or planned, make sure your first time together is relaxed and private. You don't have to have scented candles and satin sheets, but the backseat of the car in a parking lot or alleyway might not be the best place. Always be responsible; use a condom. Be prepared for after
If you do have sex, there will be an after – whether the morning after or the munchies after. Treat what happened with respect, but not absurd devotion or gratitude. Conversation will ease any tension that either of you may feel. You can even make a few jokes, just nothing that your partner might construe as meanness. Just so you know, the first time may be lousy or amazing, but it isn't always an indicator of things to come. Sometimes people stop trying to impress their partner and become selfish and other times, greater understanding and emotional closeness makes for quantum leaps in the quality of sex. In this time and age of instant gratification, sex has become an important parameter to judge relationships, but make sure this does not pressure you into doing anything that makes you uncomfortable.

Via http://www.eromance.com/relationships/bedroom-156.html

Sounds like cupid is doing quite bit better than OK.

The online dating and matchmaking industry grew 2.3 percent between 2008 and 2011, with 2.8 percent more growth expected annually through 2016, according to IBISWorld. The number of people employed in the field is expected to increase from 15,606 in 2011 to nearly 17,000 by 2016.

The growth is fueled by a high profit margin, a low (but increasing) barrier to entry and a falling social stigma against meeting your mate online. In fact, recent studies commissioned by online dating sites show that as many as 30 percent of newly married couples first met through the click of a mouse.

Excerpt taken from: www.inc.com

Are you one the 40 million Americans feeling sex-starved? If so, what are you feeding your sex life? The same old routine, perhaps, just less of it? Or maybe nothing at all? Or perhaps you’re subsisting on porn or other forms of sexual junk food and empty calories? Are you getting your Recommended Daily Allowance of healthy sex? And if daily is pushing it, how about at least weekly?

Not long ago I wrote an article for this blog imploring couples to try to have sex a minimum of once a week. My reason? When couples stop having sex their relationships become vulnerable—to anger, detachment, infidelity and, even, divorce. I believe that sex matters: It’s the glue that keeps us together and, without it, couples become “good friends” at best or “bickering roommates” at worst. When you’re stuck in a sex rut, your testosterone levels lower, and you get used to not doing it.  Having sex once a week helps to keep you tuned in and turned on, instead of tuned out and turned-off.

 But it’s not enough to just do it once a week, especially if there’s little to no variety in your sexual meal plan. Sex is like food – if you eat the same thing over and over, not only will you get bored; you’ll also end up depriving yourself of vital nutrients. And just like the food pyramid, there are different categories of sex that you should be consuming from regularly:

- There’s sex that’s loving and tender and enhances emotional intimacy (think love-making)

- And there’s sex for the sake of sex: because it feels good and relieves stress (think spontaneous quickie)

- There’s sex that taps the power of imagination and proves that the mind is the biggest sex organ (think sharing a fantasy)

- And there’s sex that plays to all of our various senses: sight, sound, smell, touch and taste

I try to offer up a “sex diet” based on weekly consumption from one of these different groups. For example, in the lovemaking category you can warm up with a hot steamy shower together that includes candlelight and lots of soap and in bed with some passionate eye-gazing. Most people close their eyes a lot during sex, so instead maintain eye contact. Force yourself to be completely present in the moment, even if it feels uncomfortable. Keep those eyes locked. Remaining connected at the highest heights of pleasure will send your intimacy levels through the roof.

In terms of category 2, sex for the sake of sex, mix it up. Don’t settle for same time, same place. According to stats, 92% of Americans have sex in their bedroom, so try a different room. And remember a quickie doesn’t need to lead to climax; it could be a way of building anticipation throughout the day.

Category 3 – fantasy – is one of my favorites. The brain is the biggest sex organ, but too many of us rely on physical pathways to pleasure instead of mental ones. In my professional experience, the couples with the most satisfying sex lives are the ones who are willing to share fantasies without judgment and share in the exploration of the taboo – even if it’s just talking about it.

Category 4 – a sensory potpourri – is the category that keeps on giving. Whether it’s taste, touch, smell, sight, or sound, there are endless combinations of pleasures that stimulate the senses. From the art of erotic massage, to aromatherapy, to pulling out the sexy lingerie, to a playlist of music that transports you to another time to toys and flavored intimacy enhancers, a sexual exploration of the senses reminds us how often we don’t engage them.

It’s easy to get stuck in a rut when you’re in a long-term relationship. And as you take the next step with your partner — and the next, and the next — new and greater responsibilities pile on (house, baby, etc.) and, gradually, sex ends up at the bottom of your list of priorities. Suddenly, and without warning, you realize that you haven’t had sex in weeks, or maybe even months! But with a healthy diet of sex, taken from all four of the sex groups, it’s easy to once again enjoy the pleasures of a home-cooked (make that a bed-cooked) meal.

Excerpt taken from: www.thechart.blogs.cnn.com